I tell you the depression is back…I tell you I want to cut…and what are you doing? Playing Modern Warfare 3. And when I explain why that makes me upset, you tell me I’m making you mad. I just can’t even explain how much that hurt. I’m telling you I wanna cut and you’re sitting there playing video games.
I’m trying so hard to fix things.
You should know I’m not one to give up.
I want to be skinny.
because i want to look cute with a belly ring.
because i want to look good in that little black dress.
because i want a cute butt.
because i want to sit down and have my stomach still be flat.
because i don’t want to have a muffin top.
because i want to be a successful before and after picture.
because i want someone to think i’m pretty.
because i want to have confidence.
I can’t take this. I really don’t know what I did to deserve this. All I do is love you, and want to be with you the rest of my life.
And now you’re mad. And coming over.
I thought maybe you’d change your mind and surprise me by coming over, but now you won’t even answer your phone.
You liked her picture.
Why would you do that? After everything we’ve been through & after telling me yesterday that she meant nothing to you. You liked her picture. And after I was on the phone with you, crying, telling you it hurt, what did you tell me? “It’s only a click”. Only a click? I’m crying my eyes out, and it was only a click? Obviously not to me. It hurt me. And after I asked you to come over and tell me you love me, what did you say? I don’t want to. Okay. That hurt me to. Especially since yesterday you said you wouldn’t do that to me. I just love you so much and I’m losing you. I just don’t wanna think about it.